February Daybook

Outside My Window:: It's wet (as in it's raining)!

I am hearing:: The carpeted upper floor gently creaking as my parents get ready for bed, the shower running, the light tippity-tap of the keys under my fingers.

I am wearing:: JPII t-shirt, comfy pj pants.

I am Thankful :: For loving, supportive, and understanding parents who are helping me to get my life in order. Sometimes I hate Friday nights, don't you? You're exhausted, and have been working all week (not like I have one and I've been too sick to even think of looking). On Friday, all our troubles and problems catch up with us and we're so tired we overact. Well maybe you don't, but I sure do.

I am Thinking:: About my friend Miss Julia Swain, and how lovely it is that she has started a blog. :) I have a whole list of bookmarked blogs that I read, (mostly written by home school mothers and a few by good friends and acquaintances), and I read them religiously (as in every day). :)

I am Pondering:: I wonder what God has in store for me. I mean I think I know what he has in store for me and that's why I'm going to Michigan this month to visit the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist. The weekend after I get back, I'm going to visit the Daughters of St. Paul for one of their mini discernment sessions/retreats. I hope that it all becomes much more clear in the near future.

I am Reading: Band of Brothers. I never thought I would find myself reading one of my brother's books about wartime, but I find myself doing so having nothing else available to read, except for Tolkien and Tolstoy of which I am not particularly fond. I enjoyed The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, but I'm not entirely eager to read Tolien's other books. It's just not my thing.

From the Kitchen:: I finally figured out how to make biscotti crunchy. It's always tasted right, but it turns out the recipe I have is missing the final step, which is to bake the cookies an extra twenty minutes or so. I am hoping to try either this weekend or next week. For Superbowl Sunday, I am going to make these for dinner. :)

I am Creating:: A photography business for myself. Last year, I bought about $1000 worth of photography equipment. I have always been into photography and had been taking pictures with a Nikon Coolpix which took decent pictures, but I was never quite able to achieve what I was envisioning. Now, with my new extraordinary zoom capability and various other fantastic features, I have a great opportunity ahead of me.

On my iPod/iPhone:: My favorites list and singing right now is Michael Buble singing Sway. What a great song. =)

Towards Rhythm:: I almost have my daily schedule down to a T. I get up (I still need to find a good time to regularly wake up at), take a shower, eat breakfast, brush my teeth, make tea, read for a few hours, go for a walk, eat lunch, watch an episode (or two) of some sort of mini-series (right now I'm really into BBC and A&E) that I find on Netflix, and then spend the rest of my afternoon on the computer or hanging out with my mother. We then eat dinner, the rest of the family goes for a walk, and then we watch something together (we just finished the first season of ER).

To Live the Liturgy:: I've been trying to turn my daily walk (see above) into a Rosary walk.

I am Hoping and Praying:: That BUMP+ continues to reach people and have a positive impact as it brings forth stories and conversation.

Around the House:: It's generally calm and quiet within the Lynch home. Right now, I believe I'm the only one still awake. ;)

On Keeping Home:: I've been making an effort to keep my room tidy. It looks decent right now thanks to the thorough cleaning I gave it at the beginning of the week. When it's clean and organized, I'm happy. A happy me is much more agreeable than a grouchy miserable me.

One of My Favorite Things: Hot chocolate in a clear blue glass mug on a cloudy and cold day. I was going to make it the easy way (the way I usually do it) with boiling water, but I changed my mind, pulled the plug of the electric tea kettle out of the wall, and heated up some milk. There really is nothing more tasty and warming. (Tea is another all time favorite, but sometimes I need chocolate.)

Reminiscing

Makes me miss having kittens around the house.

To Idolize What is Good

Note: These are more ramblings than organized/structured thought.

In my days off, or rather the days in which I have been job hunting, vocation searching, etc., I have been spending a great deal of time reading various books. On Saturday, I read the last pages of The Client as written by John Grisham. Then on Sunday afternoon, I picked up Bridge to Terabithia, a lovely story which I found quite easy to read and enjoy. I finished it last night, a mere seven hours after I had started. Before starting on The Client, I had already been reading Peggy Noonan's John Paul the Great. I had originally thought that I might read The Client and John Paul the Great simultaneously, but found the former to be more of a page turner and therefore, finished it before the latter.

I re-opened John Paul the Great this morning. Peggy Noonan wrote of her meetings with Pope John Paul II. As I read, I found myself crying happy tears and chuckling to myself over the antics of our former Pope, I recalled my own adventures in Rome and seeing Pope Benedict XVI for the first time in the Vatican. To someone of great importance, it might not have seemed of great consequence as it was just the Pope's regular Wednesday audience. But I will never forget that day. I was several rows back and the canopy under which the Pope would sit with all his cardinals looked so small off in the distance. We arrived at least two hours early and waited for what seemed to me an eternity. Then he came. And I could see him, I could see Pope Benedict XVI in his pope mobile, waving to the crowds and a beautiful smile on his face. And I melted inside. I literally teared up and became weak at the knees. I laughed as a little child would laugh with glee over the joys and excitements of Christmas time. In any other circumstances, I would have felt like a fool, but I couldn't help myself and I certainly did not care. In that moment, I forgot all my troubles and worldly cares (like the fact that I was exhausted from Professor Barber's most tiresome schedule). All that I saw or knew in that moment was a great leader, shaking hands with and waving to the vast masses of people who all felt the same way I did (or maybe not quite).

People find all sorts of idols in today's world. In fact, I am quite positive that since the beginning of time people have idolized other people, possessions, various worldly things that don't last. People cheer and shout (even scream) when a movie star or singer walks down the street, begging for an autograph, stretching across yellow tape, pushing through security just to touch a celebrity's thousand dollar coat. We worship/fantasize about such lofty lifestyles. What we don't realize is that we (you and I) are the same as Tom Cruise or Jennifer Lopez. We may not make as much money or be quite as famous, but we're the same. We're human, we make mistakes, we sin, we have relationships, we laugh, we cry, and sometimes we have bad days.

(I swear these two topics fit together perfectly in my head; I just need to find a way to connect them well enough to write down what I am trying to say.)

When I saw Pope Benedict for the first time, I went weak at the knees and I cried tears of gladness. It is not because I idolize him as God. I attribute my great joy to seeing and recognizing Benedict as a great man of God. He was chosen by the Holy Spirit to be the new Shepherd of our Church here on earth. He represents Jesus Christ to the world. Benedict is a great man because he is so close to Christ and bears so much responsibility for the wellbeing and spiritual health of the world. (He calls the shots.) I idolize Pope Benedict XVI, because I want to be like him. I idolize him as I would a role model. (Maybe "idolize" is not the right word.) I want to be holy as he is holy. On that day in Rome I saw a living saint. Don't we want to be like the saints?

I guess the point I am trying to make is that we idolize the wrong things. We idolize celebrities for their fame, their money, and their good looks. But Jesus put us on this earth and created us to know, love, and serve him. He gave us great shepherds like John Paul II and Benedict to guide us in these things and to grow in holiness. Alice von Hildebrand tells us that we should "pray for holy tears". I believe the tears that I cried in the Vatican Square were those of holy tears, tears which came from seeing and recognizing a living saint.